Split

I got lost somewhere along the way
Pieces of myself form a trail
Like breadcrumbs I didn't want to drop
Pulled from me by unseen hands
Falling of and leading back to where I left so long ago
Who knows what eyes will see those long forgotten parts of me
What feet will follow this quickly cooling trail
Leading right back to this hollow heart

Regret

I wish I didn't need to do it this way.
This retroactive repair.
It wares on my integrity,
There is a pang of irony within this action too.
Knowledge of the slimming numbers.
The fault may lie in uncertainty,
Or perhaps it is just taste,
But the remaining fact is lacking traffic.
For these few things I strive and loose such sleep?

group

Multiple places at once
Many eyes and one vision
We scan all those that cross us
We do what must be done

The Rind

Tan landscapes
Broken vases that lead to sunken treasures
This is a place you go, to be forgotten
Tiny wisps of what was once
Nothing here but a glimmer of laughter
Smoke is rising in the east and not even sunlight dares to enter
Curses uttered under baited breath
Relief is but a distant memory of a whispered dream
Feverish and wincing
No escape will be found or offered
No quarter given to those that seek relief

Trust Me,

Twisted little dervish,
The dregs don't dare to stare.
Propped up to avoid it,
But still,
The heat is beating in on all of us.
Your god is long forgotten.
Still you push the wandering forward.
The lust for something like a mirage too great to pass.
The heart of what you yearn for has ceased it's pitied beating.

The Fruitful Life

This anxiety is growing
Knowing I am wasting my potential
How many directions can I go
How much am I willing to do
For you?
I would do anything
Every ounce of sweat and blood is worth it
I know that you are worth it
You do not know yet
Not really
You may never know what has been done
What will be done
But you will never have to worry about what wasn't done
You will never see what it looks like when I don't achieve

The Wall

I am unable to overcome
These crippling doubts
Restrained by fear of failure
The conundrum begins
Incapacitated by my own unwillingness
No doubt of what I am capable of
But no motivation to prove it
This mountain will be climbed
The torment will be conquered

heart shaped space

The weight of this pressure as turned me.
Forced a change in me that none saw coming.
Willingness has shed it's utility.
Hope becomes disgust.
No longer is there a glimmer of trust behind my eyes.
A sort of diminished hatred lingers here.
Failing to even try making a disguise.

Where did I go?
Perhaps this memory is nothing more than the shadow of desire.
Things I whisper to myself to reassure the disappointment.
As the evening turn from black to powdered blue,
My thoughts of sick complacence stem from you.

Writhing tendrils searching for a home.
Eyes, in shaky desperation, land on nothing in particular.
These knuckles lost the ability to turn white,
Right about the tenth time the threat crossed your lips.

How quaint

Awake!
Offer something often overlooked
"Nothing here escapes the chance of rebirth"
The stumbling fingers.
A turn of phrase.
These glances quickly took.
I live a life of stolen pleasures,
Instantly punishing my thoughts with guilt and shame.
A prison that I built,
On rubble from a thousand silly dreams.
My life is pulled from pieces of debris.
It pales in comparison to what I am deserving of.
MY choices only here to blame.

hott

Inside this thin shell
lurking darkly below the casing
An offer unknown
Twist and contort
Lies the heart of all my life's ambition
A deity worthy of the ritual