Four Letters Worth.

This involuntary increase
the mere mention to me blinding
bound in light and inked in blood
from where my heart once stood.

The attention did nothing to restrain me
in this place I felt the beating
broken bleating ringing out to meet the throng.

Before the close of times
we stood unwillingly,
hand in hand for the last time,
taking stolen glances at the moments notice
to avoid the weight of this choice.

Still in the night I thought of this a million times
but now, with it looking back at me
so real and finite
I see that I misunderstood how it would be.
It is more than some chemical response
it came from something more real than a factual inquiry could reveal.
I will revel in it now.

Notwithstanding the sin I feel but I embrace that and use it for feeling's fuel.
For the first time this rise is something wanted,
sought so violently beyond just asking for it
but a quick breath's length shy of taking.

Beneath the glance you will feel me.
Behind the glass no longer conceal me.
In or out of order this too shall pass
through patient thought and steady deed
and you will like, no, love me soon enough.